sometime's your only available transportation is a leap of faith

-Reverend Margaret Shepherd

This quote is featured on the cover of my current journal; it's my friendly reminder to trust in my faith and in myself

At this point of my leap I am still in the air...

You know how training is supposed to prepare you for the upcoming task: how to be a fun camp counselor, how to be a supportive mentor, how to dig a volleyball like nobody's business...so far training has set my mind racing with all these teacher responsibilities (Regents examinations, differentiation, and constant assessment, oh my) and has filled my stomach with butterflies.

If you ever had the unfortunate experience of listening to me while I was making a big decision you know very well how contemplative, indecisive, and just plain annoying I can be. (Sorry and THANK YOU to those with amazing amounts of patience for my ramblings, btw!) Well, when left to sit and think about my future position in a Bronx high school I cannot help but question my readiness. I know, I know...only time will tell and I'll never know until I try...unfortunately these trite sayings have lost their comforting magic.

I don't mean to come off as pessimistic, that's the last thing I ever want to be. I'm just giving it to y'all straight...blunt honesty, in true Kristine fashion. I can't help how I feel, right? My feelings towards living in NY and being in the fellows are swinging in between excitement and apprehension. I could easily be in the upswing towards excitement tomorrow (see? optimist at heart).

Maybe the root of such capriciousness is the physical absence of the people I love most in this world, those whose open arms make up my safety net. Homesickness was bound to happen. I'm not surprised that it has surfaced after a month on my own...and I've got another month until a very important person arrives.

I guess I had to get that off my chest. Thanks for reading